Thursday, November 30, 2006
posted by Amie Lee at 2:46 pm

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Just another one of those productive conversations with my intelligent boss, Lemon.

Lemon:
(Walks towards where I was seated)
Me:
(Prepares for another one of those productive conversations)
Lemon: So (Smiles as pleasantly as he could possibly but still looks as if he did not even bother to), is the assignment I passed to you last week okay?
Me:
Yes.
Lemon: What do you mean by okay?
Me: (?!?!?!) You were the one who asked me if it is okay. Why not you ask yourself the definition of okay rather than ask me?
Lemon:
Oh… (Giggles) So, what is… Is it… Are you finished with it?
Me: Yes I am. 99.99%.
Lemon: What is the other 0.01%?
Me:
Checking.
Lemon:
Okay… (Walks off feeling satisfied)

Man, is he really that empty up there or what?! Someone, please free me from him. I would do anything and everything just to be free… Anything! Everything!
 
Wednesday, November 29, 2006
posted by Amie Lee at 8:38 am

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Something caught my interest last night:
Fantasy Football.

Nick introduced it to me when I called him last night. He seemed almost too busy to entertain me hence I had to ask what could possibly be more appealing than talking to me. I had never in my dreams thought that fantasy sports would be the answer…

I had no choice but to let him get back to his fantasy game. With nothing else to do, I logged on to the site and started to browse around. Thus I can safely say that I am now a certified fan of the American Fantasy Football League. What’s more, I discovered that one can win cash and prizes and some of the payouts are pretty impressive too.

Cool huh?!
 
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
posted by Amie Lee at 9:30 am

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I wish I may, I wish I might, have the wish I wish tonight. I wish to go to Italy!!!

My dream honeymoon spot: Italy.



I love Italy for so many reasons that I just cannot begin to name them or I would never stop. The cities that I would definitely visit (when I have the opportunity to go there) are Venice, Rome, Florence, Milan and Turin.

Italy is shaped like a boot due to some geographical reasons. Unfortunately, I do not love Italy enough to memorise its exact prevalent peninsular geographic nature.

I am truly amazed by the beauty and variety of the country’s landscapes, especially Venice. Hence that is the one city that I must visit.

The most enthralling fact about Venice is its canals and the “city on water” concept. Apparently, it is an archipelago of 118 islands formed by approximately 150 canals in a shallow lagoon. The islands on which Venice is built on are connected by about 400 bridges.

I can only imagine for now, how romantic it would be for Ivan and I to go to Italy and how much fun we would have… *dreams*
 
Monday, November 27, 2006
posted by Amie Lee at 9:53 am

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These days, I just cannot help surfing the Internet for wedding related websites. I guess the excitement to my big day is really getting to me (in a good sort of way). The best, or maybe worst, part of it is that we have not even selected a date yet.

Anyhow, no harm planning in advance right?

It is good to have something to get me going and something to look forward to in life. Otherwise each day will just be like any other day and eventually I will lose all interest in living. Man, do I sound philosophical today or what…

Anyway, back to my point earlier. I stumbled upon this
wedding invitations website that I thought was pretty good. They have lovely engraved invitations, invitation ensembles, direction cards (but you got to come up with the map), etc.

It is worth checking out! :)
 
Sunday, November 26, 2006
posted by Amie Lee at 3:12 pm

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IN PRISON you spend majority of your time in an 8’ x 10’ cell
AT WORK you spend most of your time in a 6’ x 8’ cubicle

IN PRISON you met 3 free meals a day
AT WORK you get a break for only 1 meal and you have to pay for it yourself

IN PRISON you get time off for good behaviour
AT WORK you get rewarded for good behaviour with more work

IN PRISON a guard locks and unlock the door for you
AT WORK you carry around a security card to lock and unlock all doors yourself

IN PRISON you can watch television and play games
AT WORK you get fired for watching television and playing games

IN PRISON you get your own personal toilet
AT WORK you have to share the toilet

IN PRISON you can get your family and friends to visit
AT WORK you cannot even speak to your family and friends

IN PRISON all expenses are paid by taxpayers with no effort on your part
AT WORK you pay all the expenses to go to work, eat and then pay taxes to feed and shelter prisoners

So what are you waiting for?



Kill your BOSS now!
 
Friday, November 24, 2006
posted by Amie Lee at 8:26 am

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Anyone up for a
free online games spree?

This is actually one of the few entertainment sites that I can access from my office. Every other site, especially those that enables online chat, is banned from the server. If you are asking, I work in a bank.

Anyway, this was one of the first two sites to offer classic Nintendo games online. Although now there are a number of other sites offering the same, but this is still one of the bigger attractions of the site.

The games come in an array of action, adventure, arcade, casino, fighting, humour, puzzles, racing, retro, shooting, sports, strategy, etc. Also available is the Classic NES game emulation with a selection of Nintendo games that can be played online with no downloads required (this is a real bonus).

Now take a wild guess as to who is going to spend some productive hours in the office today?
 
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
posted by Amie Lee at 2:46 pm

****************
I guess relating my encounter with the
purple reptile in dreamland inspired Ivan to have an encounter on his own. When I woke him up this morning, he held me responsible for interrupting and hence spoiling his encounter in dreamland.

After assigning the blame, he excitedly related his dream to me.

His dream revolved around a young boy (approximately 5 years old), who happened to be one of his friend’s brother in dreamland. The boy was chasing him and another friend around with a knife. Apparently, the boy was not mentally sound hence he had the knife with the intention to kill people.

Ivan related to me how they hid from the boy and how they had managed to escape from him several times. He claimed he was scared out of his wits. Imagine a fully grown adult who was afraid of a 5 year old boy… Fine, a 5 year old boy with a knife. But how sharp can the knife be? Also, there were 2 of them to tackle the midget!

2 adults, 1 boy with a knife, and the 2 adults were running from the boy. Somebody please tell me that that makes at least a little sense. My purple reptile dream is definitely worthier.

Anyway, the 2 so-called adults made it to a clinic and consulted a doctor about the boy’s illness. Apparently, the doctor was aware of the whole murderer saga and was familiar with the boy's condition. The doctor said, “*sings The O.C. theme song*”.

Ivan’s ringing tone: The O.C. theme song (not that he followed the series or anything but I kind of talked him into setting it as his ringing tone).

So there you go... I interrupted the most important part of his dream, where all mysteries are to be unravelled. Big deal.
 
Thursday, November 16, 2006
posted by Amie Lee at 8:29 am

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I stopped to catch my breath as I arrived at the departure gate. Judging from the severity of my lateness, I had expected the plane to depart without me. Much to my surprise, though, passengers were not even invited to board the plane yet. Thank heavens for Malaysia boleh!

Hence I stood rooted to the spot for a few minutes, gasping for air. When there was enough air in my lungs, I walked towards the metal detector. It was where passengers were supposed to start queuing as soon as the announcement to board the plane came on.

Soon enough, the cabin crew made an announcement for all passengers of the flight to board the plane.

Then, along came this kiasu Malay man. He placed himself right in front of me, probably afraid that I may take the seat he wanted so badly and cause him to feel sore about it for the rest of his sad, sorry and miserable life.

For your information, AisAsia flights are based on free seating - first come first serve basis. Then, he kept calling out to his friend to join him on his shameful quest. His friend, Din, apparently refused to do so and continued to be seated on the bench.

As always, elderly and children (along with their families) are given priority to board the plane first. The kiasu Malay man kept inching forward as the priority queue subsided. He then said to Din, “Orang yang book kat Internet tak boleh naik dulu. Sabar ya.”

In plain English: Those who made flight reservations via the Internet are given second priority. Be patient.

What an idiot. I almost choked to death on my own saliva upon hearing that.
 
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
posted by Amie Lee at 9:44 am

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Growing up, I was drowned in vitamins by my mother. There was a period in my life when I took 8 tablets a day – multivitamins, B complex, wheat grass extract, zinc tablets, English Primrose Oil, garlic extract, calcium tablets and vitamin C. Whenever I fell ill during that period, I would have to take the 6 tablets along with all my other “get well” tablets from the doctor.

Good thing my intake my vitamins had decreased over the years. Now I only take multivitamins, pro-biotic and vitamin C. My mother’s latest discovery is the
ginger root extract, hence I foresee an addition to my 3 tablets a day routine. Ginger root is a plant that grows abundantly in China and India where the root is used in both cooking and in medications.

As my sister and I often have problems with our digestive system, my very dedicated mother looked around for a traditional remedy. It seems that ginger root is one of the most popular herb purported to treat digestive and bowel disorders because of its ability to relax the stomach, break down protein and cleanse the colon.

Well then, I guess my table intake will be increased from 3 to 4 very soon.
 
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
posted by Amie Lee at 8:36 am

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Every now and then I would dream about snakes. I know dreaming of snakes is disgusting but it is not like I can control my dreams. The snakes that I dream about always come in different forms. By different forms, I do not mean square or round or triangle. I actually means in different sizes and colours.

The one that appeared in my dream last night was huge (like one of those oversized pythons we see in documentaries) with the biggest and sharpest set of teeth ever. I remember clearly that it was purple in colour but I vaguely recall the patches on its body, either yellow or black or both. Also, it had a slick and long tongue.

Actually, it reminded me of a nastier version of the snake plushies in Ikea.

Ivan was in the dream with me and the nasty reptile was going after us both. Somehow, it chased us all the way to my house so I quickly opened the main door and shut it behind us. Then it started to hit the glass panel that separated my living room and the garden repeatedly, as if trying to break it.

It looked so horrifying that I think I could remember it for life. I will remember its aggressive nature in attempting to shatter the glass panel. It was hissing and snarling with its mouth wide opened while shooting at me the most threatening look ever.

Here is what the dictionary of dreams has to say about snakes in dreams: A snake, being the ages old symbol of evil or satan, makes it a bad omen to have one show up in a dream. To see a lone snake and feel threatened by it shows that you have a bad enemy that is even then working against you, it also a warning against bodily harm from an enemy. To dream of many snakes in a pit is the foreboding of much bad luck in love or business. Should you overcome and kill a threatening snake in your dream shows that you will overcome your adversary and win out.

I did not kill the nasty reptile... I guess that means I am in serious trouble. Sigh!
 
Monday, November 13, 2006
posted by Amie Lee at 9:41 am

****************
As I have previously mentioned, I am an ardent supporter of wooden products in the house (flooring, features, furniture, etc.). As I have also previously mentioned, Ivan aggressively opposes wooden products because of his concern of a certain species of ants known as termites. Yes, it is sad, but true.

We are considering between laminate flooring and ceramic tiles for the upstairs.
Laminate flooring is made to look like wood flooring, but made up of either synthetic materials or of synthetic materials combined with natural ingredients and covered with decorative appliqué. In simple terms, it looks like wood in Magical Land because of its shine and glitter.

The best part about laminate flooring is that it simulates wood (love the Earth, people!), but some are made to look like marble or granite. It is a popular alternative to hardwood or vinyl because laminate flooring resists staining, wear and fading much better than wood while providing its looks and appeal.

The following are some visual appetizers:





I have read that laminate flooring is durable, about 10 times stronger than a kitchen countertop you may verify that statement by utilising the sledge hammer from Diablo II. Aside from that, it is also water-resistant hence it can be used in a bathroom (though hard to believe) as well as a kitchen or hallway.

For lazy people like me, the best part about laminate flooring is that it does not require steady maintenance (yes!!!) and protection from scuffs (yes!!!) and ridge marks (yes!!!). Hence you will not have to oil your floors, have them sanded or worry about water spills. That means more time for me to sleep and laze around the house. Ah, the joys of life.

So what are you waiting for people? Kill some trees and get laminate flooring today (man, I sound like some hard sell advertisement)! I have this strong inkling that nature lovers and environmentalists will most probably ban my blog from this post onwards. Oh well.
 
Sunday, November 12, 2006
posted by Amie Lee at 11:08 am

****************
Dear Men,


This is directed especially to those of you who say, “Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free!”

Here is an update for you.

In the modern world, 80% of women are against marriage.

Why, you ask?

This is what we say, “It is not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage.”

Cheers.


Sincerely,
Women of the 21st Century
 
Friday, November 10, 2006
posted by Amie Lee at 9:23 am

***************
Last night, I was searching the Internet for a site that provided comprehensive information in respect to Malaysian mortgages. Instead, I stumbled upon a site dedicated to American homebuyers. It was so informative that I caught myself spending at least 30 minutes browsing the website...

From what I had read, I understand that the website had almost anything and everything on
mortgages for homebuyers. If such information were available to Malaysians, we would definitely be more informed. The rate of mortgage fraud, hidden fees and the lack of transparency in the borrowing process can be really frightening.

The information available at the
mortgage loan website helps consumers fully understand the ins and outs of borrowing intelligently. On top of that, customer data (for those who wish to submit their personal information for a pre-loan application) is protected through SecureTrust, which guarantees compliance with FTC, DoNotCall & Can Spam regulations.

I simply cannot get over how useful I really thought the site is for homebuyers (American homebuyers, that is). When will there be such a resourceful website available for Malaysians?! Perhaps when kingdom comes...
 
Thursday, November 09, 2006
posted by Amie Lee at 10:58 am

****************
Ivan and I held a debate this morning: Blinds or curtains for the kitchen?

In the end,
blinds won the debate. So we went on to decide what types of blinds to get for the house but failed miserably. I guess that proves how effective we are when it comes to decision making.

As far as I know, there is a vast variety of
blinds out there. I have heard of the infamous Bella Roman Shades, vertical blinds, horizontal blinds, bamboo blinds, a variety of wooden blinds, pleated shades, roller shades, etc.

I suppose we would go for horizontal rather than vertical blinds. Vertical blinds give me the impression of an office. Imagine the feeling of being in an office in the comfort of my own home in my pretty little kitchen... That would only spell one thing: Disaster.

Somehow, my preference is always skewed towards wooden products whenever it comes to the house hence
wooden blinds is the way to go. Nevertheless, Ivan (being the practical one) expressed his concern of wood and termites (again!).

That concern of his had marked the dawn of another debate. Sigh… We should probably just settle with curtains. Brown curtains, that is, which are highly similar to wood.
 
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
posted by Amie Lee at 9:11 am

****************
The anticipation for the moment Ivan and I finally get the keys to our new home is killing me. It is almost impossible to contain all that excitement and eagerness inside my minute frame. I practically have to meditate to contain all that vigour inside me. Once a whiff is released, there will be no end to it because every bit of vigour will be released until I am deflated (think balloon, people).

After much consideration, we have unanimously made a decision to call our new dwelling the Lizard (referring to Ivan) & Bee (yours truly) Home.

Although it is approximately 3 months before we get the keys, I am already researching the various home improvement ideas, trends and products. Just the thought of renovating the Lizard & Bee Home is enough to make me jump high enough to reach the moon and bring a piece of rock home as a souvenir.

If budget is not a constraint, my dream home improvement project would be greatly desirable. I would hack all the existing flooring in the home, lay homogenous tiles for the ground floor and timber strips for the upper floor. Then, I would have wall features in the living as well as dining areas.

There would be an indoor waterfall in the living room for Feng Shui purposes, along with designer furniture from renowned manufacturers. A 42 inch Samsung plasma television would complement that setting perfectly. I prefer the contemporary concept hence I would like to keep everything simple but comfortable enough for a good retreat.

The kitchen is probably my favourite section of the home. I would renovate it extensively with marble flooring, mosaic tiles on parts of the walls, high tech stainless steel equipments, granite countertops, aluminium kitchen cabinets and a modern breakfast counter in the middle of the kitchen.

As for the master bedroom, I would keep it simple with some built-in furniture, i.e. bed frame, bedside tables, walk-in wardrobe and dressing table. I would like a wooden theme for the bedroom hence beige or light brown would be the desired colours.

See, I am not a greedy person. Having all that is enough to make me the happiest girl alive. I suppose the kitchen renovations would cost the most (which is equivalent to accumulated savings of 2 lifetimes minus the inflation) but we have all heard that the kitchen is the heart of the home, haven’t we?
 
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
posted by Amie Lee at 8:56 am

****************
Just as I switched off the lights to retire, my mobile started to ring. I then felt like I was preparing for an episode of Desperate Housewives instead of jumping into the sack – because my ring tone hummed the theme song of the television series.

I wanted to ignore the call but when I saw Nal’s name on my screen, I figured I had better answer it. Otherwise, she will never forgive me for ignoring her call, she will call over and over and over until I answer… And well, it is not everyday that I get a call from Canada.

Anyway, she called all that way just to tell me about a certain song she heard over the Internet. I had no choice but to get up and turn on my laptop. Then I went through the whole process of connecting to the Internet to access the website of the song she mentioned (imagine what it is like for a tired and sleepy person to do all that).

After listening to the song, I was actually pretty impressed. For those of you who are already reviving the Christmas spirit (and to a certain extent fancy alternative rock music), you should check out
Greener's Christmas Song. The lead singer's voice must be the one thing to have caught Nal's attention - manly, broody and sexy.




Greener is an unsigned band, it seems, and a couple of years back the number of downloads for their demo Christmas Song hit the million mark. The band had recently rerecorded a professional electric and acoustic version of the song and a portion of the proceeds this year will go to the Music Industry, HIV / AIDS charity LIFEbeat. Not bad, huh?

So Nal is definitely doing something to benefit the needy and had persistently bugged me to do the same. I told her I would think about it and she finally allowed me to hang up the phone. Before doing what I do best, I turned the lights off and swayed into the comfort of darkness...
 
Monday, November 06, 2006
posted by Amie Lee at 12:20 pm

****************
My office phone rang. I answered it. It was my boss, Lemon. He asked me to go over to his place (approximately 15 steps from where I am seated). Being the obedient slave that I was, I walked over almost immediately.

Once I had reached, he handed me 3 pieces of paper (which were actually memos). He said, “Put this on A’s table, this one on B’s and this one on C’s.”

Not a word of please or thank you to be heard.

The last time I checked, he had a pair of functional legs and he is seated closer to the 3 people than I am. What the fuck is his blardie problem? I am not a freaking secretary and neither am I his freaking slave.

Why can't he ask the secretaries to do his dirty work? Maybe because he knows it himself that those tasks are too lowly regarded, even for a secretary. Secretaries these days may repel but he knows Amie will not.

It is bad enough that he makes me fax his documents (because he does not have hands), do ad hoc reporting for him (because his time is too precious), mail documents for him (because he cannot spell), etc, and now he asks me to walk around for him as if he do not have legs.

Quoted from one of my colleagues, “If he becomes a big boss one day, he will be extremely bossy.” Another colleague said, “Yes, IF he ever becomes one. With an attitude like that, I doubt he will ever become one.”

Well said. Lemon has no management skills whatsoever and he is definitely lacking in technical skills. I can go on and on about him, and relate all the complaints I have heard about him but I will conclude here for now. Too much office politics for one day!

He is definitely taking me for granted and using my "congeniality" to step all over me. That said, there is a limit for everything, including my "congeniality". I am sorry to say this but all of us under him agree that he has all the traits of a lousy boss.
 
Friday, November 03, 2006
posted by Amie Lee at 1:38 pm

****************
Although our proposed wedding dinner is probably more than a year away, Ivan and I (actually it is more of me alone) have been thinking of what to give our guests as wedding favours. Chocolates and cakes seem to be the most common ones around hence I am hoping to find something more memorable.

Then, a light bulb appeared above my head yesterday (the result of watching too many cartoons) and I thought of
candle wedding favours. As always, I then surfed to Internet to check out the options available to us.

To be very honest, I was actually pretty impressed with the varieties I found.

The one that I particularly fancied was the chocolate candles, which looked exactly like chocolates! If we gave those out as wedding favours, we had better warn the guests that they are actually made out of wax and not the usual butter and cocoa. I also liked the candles that came in pairs, in the form of cups and fruits.

If anyone has any ideas on wedding favours, please feel free to drop me a line.
 
Thursday, November 02, 2006
posted by Amie Lee at 8:28 am

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There was this one occurrence, which happened about a year ago when I was walking out for lunch one afternoon. I cannot recall which of my colleagues were with me that day but they were all walking ahead of me.

As I was walking innocently, suddenly, I felt someone pouncing on me. The pounce was so hard that I almost fell on my face. If I was any blurer, I would have fallen on my face and the idiot who pounced on me would have very well landed on me.

When I had recovered from the shock, I slowly turned back, putting on the most poisonous glance for the person who pounced on me to receive. Standing there was a Northern Indian man, looking extremely apologetic. He was wearing a dark green long sleeve shirt with dark brown khakis (like a freaking tree), along with a lanyard hanging from his collar.

Did he do it on purpose? Is he as sorry as he looked? How did he pounce on me unintentionally? Is he a molester? Was he trying to pick my pockets? Did he dress in office wear for a reason? I continued to glare at him as all those questions were running through my mind.

Then, that very sorry bastard took his hand and started to rub my back, apologising profusely. How dare he rub my back like that…! Somehow, he confirmed most of my suspicions about him by doing that – directly or indirectly.

I am a girl of peace but I lifted my fist and planted it on his face. There is a limit to everything and that was mine.